The Girl Can't Dance: A Model Playlist

Listeners, peeping toms and curious onlookers


Writer's Almanac: Cyrano de Bergerac
[info]nyghtshayde
It was on this day in 1897 that Cyrano de Bergerac premiered at the Théâtre de la Porte Saint-Martin in Paris, France. The playwright was Edmond Rostand, and he based the play very loosely on the life of his favorite playwright, Savien de Cyrano de Bergerac, who lived in the 17th century. But mostly the play is fictional, the story of a well-born soldier with a talent for poetry who is extremely self-conscious because he has a very large nose. He is in love with a beautiful woman named Roxane, but he assumes that neither she nor any other woman will ever love a man with such a large nose. So he helps Christian, one of Roxane's suitors, by writing the poetry that Christian then recites and sends to Roxane. Of course, she falls in love with the man who writes so well, although she is mistaken about who that man is.

When Cyrano de Bergerac premiered on this night in 1897, the audience applauded for half an hour after the end of the show. It was the most successful play Paris had seen in many years. It ran for 200 nights in Paris and was produced all over Europe and the United States.


***
Let's hear it for a self-conscious writer with low self esteem because he's not perfect looking!!!! Hey, I can so totally relate to Cyrano and always have been able to. You know, I recently bought a copy of Roxanne on DVD, and I've been meaning to watch it. Perhaps I'll put it on when I wake up. *g*

On a totally different note, I changed the layout of my LJ. Again. Well, it's not really Christmas anymore, so I didn't need to leave up Robin Wood's Christmas tree. And since [info]eclipsegryph pointed me in the direction of an interesting little forum that I decided to join, the wolf side of me has reared her/his head again. So it was just fitting that I honor that totem by an LJ change. :)

There are some new icons afoot, too. Check them out. A couple of them are rather porny, but hey...who knows? I might just post a few more wild, vulgar, porntastic type posts in the future. Under a filter, of course.

I finished my CoC game tonight...
[info]nyghtshayde
And in full Tracy CoC fashion, the whole party, save one, ended up insane and dead. It wasn't like I planned, though, which amuses me.

The run-down of the game goes like this:

Location: Virginia Beach
      The Cavalier Hotel, The Cavalier Country Club, A.R.E. and a nameless condo along the beach
Time: 2009, around Thanksgiving
Weather: Cold, cloudy, wet

Cast of NPCs:

Mr. Rainey -- The hotel's manager. Stuffy, somewhat snooty but always sees to his guests' comfort. Played by Larry Miller.

Ms. Anne Dubois -- This is the hotel's assistant manager. She's a bitch; there are no bones about it. She's serious, she's strict, she's no-nonsense, and she won't take shit from anyone. She does her job efficiently and well and often harsher to deal with than Mr. Rainey. Played by Famke Janssen, the way she looked and acted in House on Haunted Hill, but dressed in a business suit with her hair pulled back.

Louis Gardnier -- This is the hotel's head chef. He wound up being Holly Potts (to be mentioned later) most valued friend in the game. He's originally from New Orleans, and his grandmother practices Voudoun, so he's seen some strange shit since he was a little boy (but nothing to prepare him for the crazed alien mushroom clusterfuck). He was played by Michael Clarke Duncan.

Zeke -- The hotel's waiter. He appeared only briefly during the day scene. A flat character who didn't move the plot along much. He was played by Hank Azaria.

John -- The head groundskeeper. A good man but a very small part. Not portrayed by anyone that I remember.

David -- The assistant groundskeeper. He was the one who discovered the strange teal-turquoise plant and mushrooms first and had been cut by the edge of the plant part first. It began to affect his behavior really badly. Later he sneaks some of the mushrooms into the soup, which of course, affects several of the patrons in the hotel and Mr. Rainey.

The Little Boy -- His mother had eaten some of the mushroom soup and was taken to the hospital after she'd begun to show teal-turquoise spots on the side of her neck and cheek. His father went to see his mother and left him behind with the hotel staff in case she was contagious. The Little Boy wound up with a row of teal-turquoise eyes across his forehead in a line then later ate one of the black mushrooms and sprouted two of the white spikes from his face. He's five years old and really adorable; I pictured my friend Mikey's son Alex for this part.

There was a bellboy, but all I remember about him was that he was cute and Isaiah (Kass' character) hit on him and invited him up to his room. But the night before the final clusterfuck, too much was going on, and he never had the chance to go up and get some lovin'. Too bad for him and too bad for Isaiah, given how everything went down at the end.

The Cast of Player Characters:

Jay: Holly Pots. A young, pretty cryptobotonist who was called in by the Cavalier hotel (first) to examine the strange plants. Then while she was there, she was called to the Cavalier Country Club. She found the teal-turquoise mushrooms/plants at the hotel and the red mouth ones at the Country Club. After that, she was called by the unnamed condos where she found the black mushrooms with the sunflower plant. The girl wound up having no sleep, nothing to eat, only cups and cups of coffee to drink and eventually flipped out when there was too much contamination, and she pulled the gas lines from the stove, trying to (I'm assuming) knock out the people in the kitchen. It didn't work quite that way.

Jeff: Dr. Jeremiah Balthazar. An archeologist/anthropologist who specialized in Egyptian and Meso-American artifacts and studies. He was OCD, had addictions out the ass and often severe cases of paranoia. He was the one to discover the tome at A.R.E. (where he was to give a lecture), which featured the different types of plants and mushrooms, which were referred to as Messengers or Angels who would be the first to come. They would hail the next wave who would then determine the worthy before the Old Ones arrived. He stole the book from the library at A.R.E. then proceeded to become more paranoid when he thought people were trying to steal the book from him. Of course, while he was losing his mind more and throwing salt and pepper shakers at the window in the dining room (at the hotel) because he saw the assistant groundskeeper staring at him (and he saw the man's bare feet, which were covered in teal-turquoise eyes that were also watching Jeremiah), the book was stolen. This drove Jeremiah into more of a frenzy until he went to the bar, had a few drinks and calmed down again. It was then that Holly Potts came to talk to him, and they saw The Little Boy with possession of the book. He was coloring in it.

Kass: Isaiah (crap, can't remember his last name). British, researcher. Interested in old Sumerian and Babylonian cultures. He was in VA Beach to hear Jeremiah speak at A.R.E. He heard whispering at night while he was in his hotel room (sounded like it was coming from the next door room). It sounded like Sumerian but it wasn't, but what he could make out was that the whispering mentioned that the messengers were coming. The next day, he went insane pretty quickly after he realized he was being watched by the assistant groundskeeper and later when he went into A.R.E. It wasn't until he went into the gardens there, however, and encountered the purple mushrooms that whispered to him that he fully lost it. Of course, this is partly because he picked one of the big mushrooms with the spikes then heard the baby one whining, so he took it, too. Then he went back to the hotel.

Carlos: Duran. He was a very strange new age priest. He carried crystals around with him, all about the same shape and point but different colors, and he would consult with them. He was pretty belligerent most of the time, insisting that the hotel give him a laptop and all sorts of other things. When that didn't happen, he went to Best Buy. While he was walking alongside the building, he noticed this three-faced priest there staring back at him, and he went batshit insane, screaming and eventually charged the window, trying to get to it. Eventually, the cops came to take him away and when they went to the hotel to look in his room, they discovered a Glock and a Desert Eagle. Of course, later, he escaped from the cops and came back to the hotel, only now, he had three faces like the priest he saw, and he stole one of the cops' guns, shot through one of the kitchen windows and hit The Little Boy in the head with a bullet.

By this point, Isaiah's been affected by the gash in his hand and the purple mold on his other hand from the baby mushroom. Jeremiah tried to leave the kitchen with the tome, but he ran into Mr. Rainey who'd grown two long sets of fingers coming out of both sides, only they ended in pincer like nails, and he stabbed into Jeremiah. Thus infecting him. This was when Holly decided that everyone was contaminated and pulled the gas line. Then Jeremiah lit a cigarette and blew the hole back of the hotel off. Killing just about everyone.

Here's the fun part:

The Little Boy walked out of the burning kitchen, completely unharmed. He still had the eyes and claws and a bullet hole in his head. He stepped out of the kitchen, took Duran's hand and the Little Boy and Three-Faced New Age Priest walked away from the building together.

The end. LOL

Okay. There were four different mushrooms and plants that grew up before the mushrooms.

All of them come from meteors that are the size and shape of large pecans. When broken, they look as delicate as pecan shells, but when picked up, they're very dense like heavy rocks. Also when broken open, the insides are whatever color that particular plant is, and it oozes out like a thick, viscous jelly, which then seeps into the ground and starts immediate growth.

♥ The first was the sweet grass looking plant: http://www.madabouthealth.com/upload/madabouthealth/Sweetgrass.jpg

Only the grass itself is teal at the outer edge and turquoise inside. The blades look like that, but when touched, the edges are very sharp and will cut through skin easily. The mushrooms that grow from that are a whitish-gray with spots on them that are turquoise ringed with teal. When they're small, they're only spots, but as they grow bigger, the spots become eyes that will stare and wink and blink. From underneath the caps, two fingers with nails and everything will come out and have full mobility. When they're even larger, and if they're pulled from the ground, those fingers will sprout from the bottom of the stem and can actually walk.

♥ The second type comes from a plant that looks very similar to a kalanchoe plant: http://www.puyallup.wsu.edu/Hort/Hort332/images/plantlist/kalanchoe.jpg

Only, the greenery part of the plant is taller and thinner. The flowers are deep blood red.

The mushrooms on these are also a whitish-gray, but the spots are red and as the mushrooms grow, the red spots become lips, which become mouths. They speak in whispery tones and will sound like a language that anyone listening will understand. When they are fully mature, a tail will sprout from either the stem or underneath the cap, and it switches back and forth like a cat's tail, but it's got a barbed point at the end.

♥ The third type has a tall sunflower, which has pale yellow petals and dark black seeds/center. http://www.essencesonline.com/Sunflower-big.jpg

The mushrooms, however, are solid black with white spots when they're small, and when they get older, the white spots will suddenly shoot out and become sharp white fang-looking spikes. The spikes are solid and will scratch and hurt and cut very easily.

♥ The fourth kind of plant looks like a thistle, but the purple itself is much darker, like a royal purple. http://www.simplythebests.com/nhoes/images/thistle.jpg

The mushrooms start out lavender and cute and soft looking, but as they get bigger, they darken to the royal purple, and from the edges of the cap, orange spiky rays grow out. These are also sharp and will cut a person very easily.

Just posted as a comment to [info]fiat_knox's LJ...
[info]nyghtshayde
First Christmas without Jeff was way less emotional than I expected it to be. This is good.

My first ever Christmas roast turned out smashing and Yorkshire pudding was fabulous as ever (it even cooked with boobs this year).

There were things I would have liked however. Like, if I'm the one who does pretty much all of the cooking, then my sister and I should
not be the only ones doing the dishes. I should not have to ask someone to help only to have that person disappear as soon as they think they're done.

Oh and from this moment on, I'm banning television during holidays. If it's on, people are distracted by it, they don't help, they don't socialize, and I'm not having this shit again.

Otherwise, my day was really good. :)

Christmas food photos...
[info]nyghtshayde
I made my first Christmas roast beef today... )

And this year, the Yorkshire pudding had boobs. )

The finished meal on my plate... )

Needless to say, we took a much needed walk after lunch with Katie and Cheyenne. It was a pretty long walk, too...

...and Katie decided to lay down at one point to eat grass... )

Chocolate sheath cake ahead...this was dessert! )

All in all, it was a good Christmas. Quieter than ones past, but I think we all know why that is at this point. Still, it was fabulous and once more, I proved I'm a fanTABulous cook. Now I'm full of food, relaxed and groovy at the apartment with a very sleepy Katie next to me. :)

IO SATVRNALIA!
[info]nice_girls_play
..Oh, and Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy Kwanza, Happy Solstice..



Because nothing says the holidays like Kenneth Anger ;) (Or gay outlaw bikers set to 1950s music).

Okay, maybe I shouldn't write smut while watching Mass...
[info]nyghtshayde
The top/head of that Wise Man statue, because his headwrap is a skin-tone peach, looked like an erect penis pointing toward the congregation as they move through the line for communion.


Oh I am a very very very naughty monkey. *facepalm*

There is just something delicious...
[info]nyghtshayde
...about writing really hot, horny, very pornographic mansex...

...while watching the Christmas Eve mass on TV.






MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

I think I forgot -those- lyrics in the song...
[info]nyghtshayde
funny pictures of cats with captions
see more Lolcats and funny pictures

cute pictures of puppies with captions
see more dog and puppy pictures

YES!!!! *dies laughing*
[info]nyghtshayde
queen elizabeth II and lady gaga
see more Lol Celebs




This is beautiful. Except for the taking down Magneto part. That wouldn't leave us with a very Merry Christmas at all.

Take that stress and divorce and Katie nearly dying and grad school application anxiety!
[info]nyghtshayde
Fall 2009 Grades





I kicked your ass, Final Semester Bastard! HAH!

Happy Yule to all!
[info]nice_girls_play
I just read what might be the best holiday fic ever:

Through the Wire by Vulgarweed

It's a Good Omens story. What makes it the best? The evidence:

At the moment, Crowley was spending some time at the studios of a cable news and commentary network supervising the finishing touches on a masterwork—a fictional “War on Christmas” that did a brilliant job of pushing people of all faiths and political leanings into a grumpy, dodgy, slow-burn state of holiday-coloured paranoia. From the Christian inspired by the martial rhetoric into bellowing “MERRY CHRISTMAS” oh-so-defiantly at the cabdriver with the turban and the Q’uran verses, to the mild-mannered Wal-Mart greeter so paralysed with fear of offending someone that he said nothing and got a black mark for unfriendliness, to the atheist convinced that the school holiday pageant had subliminal indoctrination, to the taxpayers’ time spent so freely debating the issue in Congress, Crowley knew he had a gift that would keep on giving, and every bratty teenager who ever stole a baby Jesus doll out of a yard nativity scene was his ally...

Proof at last, the whole "war on Christmas" is a demonic pastiche designed for amusement. Delightful.

And while many teens and other young people sit on their asses playing video games and bitching...
[info]nyghtshayde
A Royal was out to make a difference.


The whole story under here... )

And people say that animals have no higher functioning or spirituality...
[info]nyghtshayde
Baboons share a mystical moment...



Just in case the link disappears like Christmas cookies... )



So, there. I'm so tired of humans thinking they're superior to animals because we supposedly have "higher functioning brains". (Oh yeah. Real high functioning. That's why we can't manage to live in harmony ever and over-breed and are just plain stupid most of the time) I'm tired of people telling me that animals have no spirituality, no creativity (like no music, no art, no storytelling capacity). Fuck that.

Merry Christmas...here's a fabulous story of animals honoring the Mystery in the world.

They say crafting makes for healthy brains..
[info]nice_girls_play
And now that I've spent the entire weekend painting, decoupaging and making silver and gemstone jewelry for my friends and loved ones, my serotonin and epinephrin are both up and I can feel those neurotransmitters firing on all cylinders again. It's nice.

For those of you who don't know, I've spent the past week losing my shit over a variety of things in the news, the biggest of which is the anti-gay legislation in Uganda that will include execution for gay citizens caught "having gay sex often."

I'm still avoiding the news through Xmas, but someone posted a comment that caught my eye:

sekai:
With all the persecution we suffer, I think it's high time we talk about creating our own homeland like that Jews did. Scoff if you want, but it worked for them.


It's a nice hypothesis. The flaw in that logic though is that Israel had the support of other solvent nations in carving out property rights, establishing borders, building an economic base, etc.

So the question then becomes: who would support a gay nation?

It's a short but interesting list:

1) Spain probably would. They have marriage equality and hate crimes legislation (though they do not keep records and report statistics on bias crimes).

2) France would front a loan for the sole purpose of irritating both America and England (and any fundamentalists that linger within their own borders).

3) Italy would probably offer up land both to satisfy Dolce & Gabbana and to irritate the little city-state they got saddled with centuries ago.

4) Norway. Like those Nobel Prizes they've been handing out the past few years (Carter, Gore, Obama...), their donation to a gay nation would be a kind of (completely justified) wrist-slap to America for all the ills of the past ten years.

5) South Africa. The former colonized nation recognizes both same-sex marriages and civil unions (couples can choose which kind of partnership they want), open immigration channels for bi-national couples, adoption for same-sex couples... Wow. It's amazing what 20 Apartheid-free years will do.

Minor players: if we really pushed it, we might get some spare change from India, Nepal and Cambodia.

But Rebecca! Where's your beloved UK? And Ireland?

Nowhere in sight sadly. The UK have civil unions but as the center of the Anglican Church (Uganda's largest supporter and co-owner of 'Ugandan Gold,' the coffee that hates), it's doubtful they would risk alienating even more of their base. Also, let's not forget the former prime minister's little Opus Dei faux-pas just a few years ago (proof that a public official will campaign for one thing and then do the opposite when others aren't looking). Ireland decriminalized homosexuality more than 25 years after Great Britain (and ten years *before* America) and forbids bias crimes, but they can't even agree on the abortion issue or whether gay and lesbians should have joint adoption. No way we'd see a penny from either of these gorgeous countries.

Altogether, the donated coffers would buy Gay Nation the five blocks in San Francisco that we already own. Not a lot, but it's better than nothing.

One more bit of cute for the road...
[info]nyghtshayde
Jenn and Katie!





Thank you, [info]thewingsofisis, for coming to my graduation! It was so fucking awesome to see you and get to spend time with you!!!! I love you!
Tags: , ,

From breakfast this morning...
[info]nyghtshayde
Jeffery and Jenn inside Andy's Kitchen



Jeffery and Jenn outside of Andy's Kitchen


This is so true...
[info]nyghtshayde
Your horoscope for December 20, 2009

Plans for travel or for educational expansion could keep you very busy today, Tracy. Making lists could be very helpful in keeping track of everything. Telephoning others who are involved could be frustrating, especially since some of those you need to reach won't be available until tomorrow. Still, getting together whatever you'll need should be accomplished rather quickly, and this could make you feel good if nothing else.

I think there was almost manporn outside my window last night...
[info]nyghtshayde
So about 3am this morning, I woke up (wasn't sleeping very deep anyway) to yelling and bellowing outside and downstairs from my bedroom window. I thought it was just neighbors or something, but it sounded like a huge fight. I climbed out of bed and looked out the window...

...and saw a sports car parked with one guy looking out at two guys on the ground. One guy was pinning the other one underneath him and the pinned one was bellowing. I watched to see if it was like some guy getting the shit beaten out of him (or raped), but while the guy on top did look like he was kissing him at different points, the guy on the bottom kept smiling and looking like he was actually happy. I mean, I was ready to call 911 if I needed to, but I don't think I needed to.

A couple of times, I did start to go back to bed, but then I'd go back to the window to see what the hell was going on. Finally the guy on top picked up the guy on the bottom and put him over his shoulder and carried him where I couldn't see him. But I watched as intently as I could (yes, perv, I know) just to make sure that the guy wasn't actually being hurt but he kept laughing and kissing the other guy back.

So I was a little disappointed when the manporn was carried out of my view.

Merry-fucking-Christmas to me, eh?
Tags:

Oh yeah...pics...
[info]nyghtshayde
Graduation pics! )

I AM A GRADUATE!
[info]nyghtshayde
I AM OFFICIALLY A COLLEGE GRADUATE!!!!!

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